By Duke Harten

You’re never going to get a girlfriend sitting on the sidelines. You have to put yourself out there.

Like, for instance, if you’re in the car and you see an attractive woman on the sidewalk, what you want to do is roll down the window and whistle. Whistling is good, if you can’t think of anything to shout. But shouting is better. You want to make sure you say something about her legs or her butt or her breasts so she knows you’re interested. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen guys get put in the Friend Zone because they don’t communicate their interest properly. Careful, though. You don’t want to come off as desperate. So after you shout the compliment, drive away as quick as you can. She’ll be left thinking: wow, that guy made me feel really sexy and hot.

Or say you’re at a bar and see a girl sitting alone reading a book. Easy. Go up and ask what book she’s reading, and then say, “Yeah, I’ve heard of it.” (Most likely it will be something gay, like fiction or poetry.) Then ask her a question to show that you want to get to know her. I like to start with, “Do you have a boyfriend?” Even if she says yes, don’t give up! You’ll be in the Friend Zone forever if you let women walk all over you like that.

Sometimes a girl will make out with you if she’s drunk. This means she wants to have sex. But a lot of times having sex will make a girl feel ‘slutty’ so when you start taking off her clothes she will tell you to stop. This is a hilarious trick. You can reassure her by saying something like “Nobody will know.” Friend Zone avoided.

The best is when a girl is asleep. Let me tell you, this is like fish in a barrel. By the time she’s awake it’ll be way too late to put you in the Friend Zone.